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Wednesday, July 30, 2014

Fifty Shades of Grey Drinking Game

Fifty Shades of Grey: The Drinking Game

Because at this point, booze may be the only way to get through the rest of this book.

One Drink:
  • "Oh my"
  • "Double Crap"
  • "Mighty _____," particularly "mighty fine."  (Who even says this?)
  • Christian's "long fingers" are mentioned
  • "My subconscious."
  • someone gasps  (no seriously you will be amazed by how often this happens)
  • absurd product placement (cars, tea, computers, etc. mentioned in excessive brand detail)
  • Ana "flushes" or "blushes"
  • Grey's pants hang "in that way"
  • gift-giving disproportionate to the relationship
  • unnecessary lists of three (one adjective or metaphor is more than sufficient most of the time, E.L. James)
  • Ana refers to her roommate by her full name, Katherine Kavanagh, rather than simply "Kate."
Two Drinks:
  • Ana is painfully ignorant to the point that you have to forcefully suspend your disbelief
  • "Inner goddess"
  • "Laters, ____."
  • Grey does something so pretentious/ridiculous you have to stop reading to laugh. 
Bottoms-Up:
  • You are actively offended.
  • Unnecessary ellipse ("…")
  • Someone refers to sex as "doing it."
  • Someone refers to a part of the anatomy ambiguously as "…there." 
Round for the Whole House:
  • A sexual act feels non-consensual to you. 

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